You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize
