I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
