My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
