have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
