genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
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