the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize