Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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