Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
