So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
He? As in you personified your dick?
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
