so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
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