Me too!
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
