Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
