Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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