just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
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