is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Never underestimate the power of titties
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
