"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
