It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize
