Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
