yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
