they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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