Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
