I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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