I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Randomize
