I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
