I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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