i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Randomize
