haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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