how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize