too bad you live with your parents still
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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