i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
