I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
