I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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