So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Randomize
