Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I currently don't understand fingers.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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