need another drink. this is the easiest way
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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