how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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