420 ftw
I need help removing her.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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