i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
