So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Randomize
