census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
