u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
What a dumb baby whore.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
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