I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
