Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
