This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Randomize
