I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
i came on her dog
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I need to calm my uterus...
Randomize
