omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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