I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I can't put those talents on a resume
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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