If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
