oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
