I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
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