All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Randomize
